Debbie Crane, LCSW/ACSW ۰ 704-874-2387
  - 1301 Bessemer City Road ۰ Gastonia, NC 28052
  - 13 South Main Street, #308 ۰ Marshall, NC 28753

How It Works . . . according to Deb Ö

When you come to counseling, you should use the first few sessions to figure out if you have rapport with your counselor. Find out if you can establish that special trusting relationship with her. The healing in therapy comes from the relationship itself. So if you canít build that special trusting relationship, itís time to move on and find another counselor. (Thatís why there are so many different counselors, so that everyone can have a therapist who fits with their own personality and the problem.) If you canít get that special rapport, youíre wasting your time and moneyÖ

The way therapy works is through a conversation. We sit here and talk. Itís a way to solve problems by talking.

I tend to be positive and future focused. Oh, I know we need to talk about some things that happened in the past, but I want therapy to be goal-oriented and based on your plans for the future. I work on the goals that you want to achieve for yourself. Itís not my business to set the therapy goals for you; I can only help you achieve your own goals. I can help, though, if you want to talk about what might be possible. If itís possible in the world, itís possible for you. Itís only a matter of howÖ

I always tell people that I am an old lady. Iíve been in this business a long time. And Iíve learned a lot in these 40+ years. But there is really only one thing I do that ever helps people. That one thing is: Sooner or later I open my mouth and give my honest opinion of what youíre telling me. And I hope youíll open your mouth and give me your honest opinion, too. If we do that there will be just the two of us sitting in this room with no one overhearing us, exchanging honest opinions. And in my experience, that is all we need to solve your problem. Some people tell me thatís ridiculous. They say you canít solve anything by talking. But 40+ years of success tells me that we can. If we will talk honestly and not give up, we can deal with anything. If we start lying to each other, or we give up, then weíll never get anything done.

In order to help someone I have to listen very carefully so that I am sure I understand. That is the secret trick, if there is any, to doing good therapy.

I keep from burning out, I guess, because I stay pretty much in a state of awe at the resilience and strength of my clients. They are amazing people who have survived so much! I am thrilled by how well they do. I am honored to know them, to learn from them and to be in their presenceÖ